Is my writing alright?

Watch for run-on sentences were you separate two separate thoughts with commas. Try to start each paragraph with a unifying mainidea that the other sentences follow naturally. When you change ideas, change paragraphs. I could make more extensive notes to you personally when i have more rime to read and proof your work. That is up to you. I should like to follow your progress with this if you like: ilcounican@yahoo.com.